"It's clear" said the teacher, "That you haven't studied your geography. What's your excuse ?"
"Well, my dad says the world is changing every day . So I decided to wait until it settles down !"
Teacher: What can you tell me about the Dead Sea?
Pupil: Dead ?, I didn't even know he was sick !
What are the small rivers that run into the Nile ?
The juve-niles !
Teacher: Why is the Mississippi such an unusual river ?
Pupil: Because it has four eyes and can't see !
Teacher: What are the Great Plains ?
Pupil: 747, Concorde and F-16 !
Teacher: Where is the English Channel ?
Pupil: I don't know, my TV doesn't pick it up
Pupil: My teacher was mad with me because I didn't know where the Rockies were.
Mother: Well next time remember where you put things !
Teacher: Why does the statue of liberty stand in New York harbour ?
Pupil: Because it can't sit down !
Teacher: Is Lapland heavily populated ?
Class: No, there are not many Lapps to the mile !
Name an animal that lives in Lapland ?
A reindeer Good, now name another .
Another reindeer !
Can you tell me where elephants are found ?
We don't have to find elephants, they're so big, they don't get lost !
What fur do we get from a tiger ?
As fur as possible !
I got a 35 in maths and 25 in english, but I knocked them cold in geography
I got zero !
What birds are found in Portugal ?
Portu-geese !
Name three famous poles ?
North, south and tad !
What do we do with crude oil ?
Teach it some manners !
What is an island ?
A piece of land surrounded by water except on one side.
On one side ?
Yes, on top !
Teacher: Give me three reasons why the world is round
Pupil: Well my dad says so, my mum says so and you say so !
What shape is the world in? Rotten !
Why does you geography exam have a big zero over it.
It's not a zero, the teacher ran out of stars, so she gave me a moon instead !
