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Geography Punchlines
"It's clear" said the teacher, "That you haven't studied your geography. What's your excuse ?"
"Well, my dad says the world is changing every day . So I decided to wait until it settles down !" |
Teacher: What can you tell me about the Dead Sea?
Pupil: Dead ?, I didn't even know he was sick ! |
What are the small rivers that run into the Nile ?
The juve-niles ! |
Teacher: Why is the Mississippi such an unusual river ?
Pupil: Because it has four eyes and can't see ! |
Teacher: What are the Great Plains ?
Pupil: 747, Concorde and F-16 ! |
Teacher: Where is the English Channel ?
Pupil: I don't know, my TV doesn't pick it up |
Pupil: My teacher was mad with me because I didn't know where the Rockies were.
Mother: Well next time remember where you put things ! |
Teacher: Why does the statue of liberty stand in New York harbour ?
Pupil: Because it can't sit down ! |
Teacher: Is Lapland heavily populated ?
Class: No, there are not many Lapps to the mile ! |
Name an animal that lives in Lapland ?
A reindeer
Good, now name another .
Another reindeer ! |
Can you tell me where elephants are found ?
We don't have to find elephants, they're so big, they don't get lost !
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What fur do we get from a tiger ?
As fur as possible ! |
I got a 35 in maths and 25 in english, but I knocked them cold in geography
I got zero ! |
What birds are found in Portugal ?
Portu-geese ! |
Name three famous poles ?
North, south and tad ! |
What do we do with crude oil ?
Teach it some manners ! |
What is an island ?
A piece of land surrounded by water except on one side.
On one side ?
Yes, on top ! |
Teacher: Give me three reasons why the world is round
Pupil: Well my dad says so, my mum says so and you say so ! |
What shape is the world in?
Rotten ! |
Why does you geography exam have a big zero over it.
It's not a zero, the teacher ran out of stars, so she gave me a moon instead ! |
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